gerard butler olympus has fallen GALS 300 weirdly obsessive gerard butler WO chasing mavericks playing for keeps PS I love you phantom of the opera
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I’ve followed the “good" fans over the years. Basically because their behavior puzzles me. It shocked me how some lost themselves to the point of damaging their lives and that of their loved ones. Women leaving their husband and children. Women having a severe identity crisis, changing their names. Like Butterfly who lived in the shrubs near Viggo’s house for months. Cuts and bruises all over from the branches which she crawled through daily. Mental meltdowns and fraudulent conventions to get close to the stars. The “good" fans are long gone but members of our forum still keep in touch with christmas cards, presents and emails from around the world for more than a decade now. To normal fans fanship is a joyous hobby in their lives but to some fans it's their whole life and it can become destructive.
I saw PS I love you on tv in 2009 when I was going through a grieving process. I knew Hillary Swank but Gerard who? I literally cracked up when I looked him up on IMDB. Saw it, loved it, oh in that movie too. I watched a few movies again and laughed some more. I somehow had noticed him in many roles years earlier, still the penny never dropped that he was the same actor. In Reign of Fire his character died in a fire. I remember thinking "oh no" couldn't they've let Matthew McConaughey or Christian Bale get fried to a crisp. His characters were always appealing to me. Even more as the lead character such as in Timeline, although ............ I watched and loved 300 because of a Lord of the Rings actor being in it. However I could never manage to get past the ridiculous beard Gerry wore in it. WOW that’s the same guy?

I quickly skipped the “kiss Gerry’s ass” forums. GALS gave me the creeps when I stumbled on a fan being chastised for their concept of bad behavior. Been there, seen that, no way, not again. I ended up with Webmistress Dianne of Weirdly Obsessive. The vibe was similar to the Lord of the Rings forum where we stood by a pregnant woman in the chat room, people from all over the world. She was terrified while going into early labor with her husband in Iraq and her mother not scheduled to come for another month. I was hoping to find the same thing on Dianne’s board. Well not a pregnant woman going into early labor LIVE but nice normal funny people. What a revelation! Since Lord of the Rings there’s cellphones, twitter, facebook. Everybody tweets constantly and there’s rarely a dull moment waiting for news. However the value of “I’m standing in the loo, peeing beside Gerard Butler. I'm going to ask him to yell This is Sparta” still totally escapes me. One of my computer science projects was about the safety of internet. My first "Gerard Butler" search on facebook led to the story of a woman going to one of his Los Angeles premieres. She had posted photos of her outfit preparations, which included photos of herself in her special underwear. First her knickers, then her bra, for the whole world to see.
When you get a photo like this on your screen that’s reaaallly nice when you’re having a shitty day. Sorry but being disabled does NOT mean I’m A-sexual. That's a myth about disability. It doesn’t mean I’m blind and I’m still not retarded either ..... and I'm not going to apologize for it! He's a DAMNED GOOD PAINKILLER!!!!!!
I remember my first post on the forum very well. Is Gerard Butler even nice? The amount of stuff that’s out there about him was terrifying to me and I wasn’t the only fan who asked. I've seen a lot of new fans ask the same question. I have enough common sense to know much of the sensationalized press is crap but I have also met actors who’s real life character wasn’t very pleasant. The fans were adamant that Gerry has a bad wrap but he’s the sweetest guy ever. He would always spot a wheelie. Early 2010 he was scheduled to appear at the Berlin film festival. I didn’t want to go as my mother was still recovering from a skull fracture and resulting coma. She urged me to go anyway because I needed a break. I must admit I went with a heavy heart because I was looking after her every day. I’ve driven through snow storms in my electric wheelchair to get to her. Getting stuck and having to dig myself out because in the middle of nowhere there's no help around.
Prior to the trip shit already hit the fan. Out of the blue a fan contacted me to let me know she asked the mothership GALS if they could help. I had not asked for that, nor would I ever do that for obvious reasons. She wanted to let me know I was LYING about being disabled and they were not going to waste their good contacts on me. Why she thought it would be kind to inform me of this is beyond me. It's an insult! If you think it can’t get worse you’re wrong. Another “good" fan from GALS gave me a speech about how to respect Gerry. "It's given to all new fans". To me it just screamed the assumption that I was raised by baboons. Mom raised no fool. I gave her private information that I didn’t mind popping up online to test her. Not only did she share it with others but she later used it to attack me on the forum, for everybody to read. She also warned me that Gerry has the most aggressive fans which would ironically prove to be her. Even my choice of hotel was under scrutiny. I always pick an affordable hotel nearby so I can get back quickly in case of an emergency. I have a large bag of medication with me which is impossible to carry around all the time. I only carry a special selection with me.
“If you could cancel your hotel out of respect for Gerry that would be great”. HUH? I remembered the hotel policy. It said they would keep half my money. I just couldn’t believe it and told her that. I have a tiny income, you can’t be serious? No she was dead serious and if I respected Gerry I would cancel. WTF you have to see this. Friends and family were shocked to read it. Gerry wasn’t even staying in the hotel but it was his anyway. I'm not the kind of person to care about such things. After being outside in the cold I was more interested in a hot bath, the complimentary chocolate display in our room and slipping into bed. I have my priorities straight. I had encountered this “bad fan checklist” before but this was a step up. I knew I was placed on the bad fan list the moment I said no. My trip to Viggo was under similar circumstances but not to this level. People on our Viggo forum had reached out to arrange help whenever necessary and “good fans” came to our forum telling me they would NEVER HELP MY KIND. It got so bad there were fans who feared for my life but none of the whackos confronted me personally. My brother is not only chauffeur, doctor and diaper changer …… hihi sorry no I’m kidding. I still haven’t reached that point yet …… but he's also my bodyguard. He’s Gerry’s size and will defend his sister from crazy women. In fact he regularly warns me to “not ever become like that”. Like most men he doesn't like the good fans' bullshit and thinks they need to get a life. There were lots of fans who told me they had warned Gerry’s team of my plans and I had good hopes this would be another great adventure.
Berlin is a struggle, it's horrifying cold. I take boiling baths to keep my muscles under control. If I’d get a pain attack I’d be screwed. Of course it wasn't warm until the day we went home. We found the press conference building and there weren’t many fans there. After a rather rude greeting from the previously mentioned "good" fan, which instantly ended her offer to help me, my brother immediately thought “this is going to be a nightmare”. He puts me in a safe spot behind the barricades. Oh great the top bar in front of my eyes and the barriers are completely covered with tarp. I hardly see anything in front of me and I can only see a wall of people beside me. Due to my leg supports pushing against the barrier I’m sitting 2-3 feet back, despite sitting up front. I feel like a 5 year old “mommy I can’t see anything”. When Gerry arrives everybody screams his name and you can’t miss that he has arrived. People on my right are leaning towards him. He must almost be here. Damned I can't see anything but people's butts as they lunge themselves over the barriers while I can't do that. The person beside me is clearly touching him now. It’s my turn ……….. and then he goes away. CRAP! No worries, he’s crossing the street and is coming back. He’s now making eye contact with the women he just greeted. I can hear him think “I shook her hand and her and her …” as he goes down the line, while walking towards us. Just as he reaches me his eye level doesn’t drop down to me, as I expected, but he turns left. CRAP! Ah well, new game plan. Let’s go sit across the street, no tarped barriers there. When he comes out the door he will look right at me. Yeah right, he quickly jumps in the car just in front of us and leaves. I later learn the schedule was too tight and he was running late. No worries, I still have my wheelie tickets to see Coriolanus. Of course one of the good fans already mentioned before the trip that it's very unfair I got a wheelie ticket, while she couldn't get a ticket. It's obviously not fair there are about 4 wheelie tickets and the organization warned me I don't have a chance in hell, while there are ONLY 1600 normal tickets. The complaining fan got several tickets just like everybody else. After we take a break in our hotel, where I defrost my legs again, we head for the theater.
OMG what a crowd and it’s even colder. We decide to wait in the lobby and look for a good spot where I would be visible. Not many people there and I still have hope. Personnel keep changing their mind and keep moving me until I'm between the crowd again. There's a nice rope and no barriers so I sneak forward to be able to see something. Sadly personnel catch me and my feet have to be behind the rope. At that point I know it will go wrong again, as I hear people screaming Gerry’s name outside the building when he arrives. This is my last chance. I will go for anybody who comes within reach. Everybody who suddenly appears in front of me is only visible to me for seconds unless they stop. Before the trip I thought Gerry would be easy, Ralph Fiennes would probably be harder and Vanessa Redgrave would never give her autograph. I talk to who later turns out to be Ralph's security. He asks me about the photo from Coriolanus I have with me for autographs. Ralph suddenly appears out of nowhere and walks by. WHHHAAAAAA but in that second the security guy just waves his arm towards me and Ralph makes a smooth U-turn. THUD a big rock falls from my heart. He happily signs my photo although the man is clearly insecure about how to treat a wheelie. He shakes my hand as if I'm a baby. Well at least he's not squeezing it to pulp. People display all sorts of behavior upon meeting me. The funniest is still the guy who walked into a lamppost because he was looking too much at me zooming around in my wheelchair. Being in an excited crowd is a very bad idea. My wheelchair starts shaking on its wheels from people pushing. My brother has to keep it down to prevent it from tipping over, while trying to capture the moment. He later tells me he had to pull several people off of me, while holding my wheelchair down with his knees. That explains why my arm hurt.
In the corner of my eye I see Vanessa look at Ralph to see what he's doing, as she's trying to pass. She stops and waits in line for me until Ralph is done. THUD!!!! I couldn’t have been happier that my bad luck was changed for the better. Vanessa is a darling as she graciously greets me and talks to me. In the blink of an eye we simultaneously see Gerry rush by behind her. Gerry!!! I quickly tell Vanessa I'm a fan. Bless her heart, she tries to get Gerry to come back but he flies up the stairs. Boy those long legs are fast. Vanessa apologizes to me for not being able to catch him but I don’t blame her. Meeting her was the best part of the day.

Vanessa Redgrave